Sunset Cruise

For me, this warm month is just the opposite of that physics where the sun hits a balloon and expands it to a nice bold size where it can bounce around with joy.  The sun (and resulting heat) hits my soul and deflates me as if all that hot air (that some might say I have an abundance of and love to share) disappears into the cool air conditioning and I collapse in a semi-coma on the sofa like a limp shadow of myself.  I search about for just the tiniest bit of energy to finish one last chore but every ounce seems to have retreated to the shadows.

My husband, on the other hand, is full of energy.  He has so much energy that just sitting still mid-afternoon might give him a heart attack and he cannot bob his foot long enough before he must jump up and begin another task.  He can always find some chore outside that needs to be done and come back in an hour later drenched in sweat looking like an Olympic swimmer with victory all over his face at the success of completing another chore on an unbelievable August afternoon.

This week he asked for an evening canoe trip after dinner.  I had put him off too many times and with his birthday (number 69) just around the corner, I knew I had to agree.  I indeed felt too guilty to turn him away one more time.  This wasn't really a 'canoe trip', because he attaches a small wooden transom to the stern of the aluminum canoe and starts a small gasoline motor that moves us through the humid air drying the sweat from our brows as we skim the water.

We crossed the inlet of the finger of the river and headed to the open waters where most boats had already reached their home dock in the waning evening.

We disturbed two birds (barely seen on the far left of this photo above) as we passed the area of the shore that is an orgasmic retreat for the fossil lovers at our local museum.  The dirt is like cement, so only the most dedicated would dig for fossils here.

I was concerned about the setting sun since our canoe cannot be seen by motor boats very easily.  Hubby handed me some bow lights and I spent a concerted effort while bouncing on a small chop trying to attach them under the lip of the bow in front of me.  Finally I was successful and when I tried to turn this red/right green/left light on I pushed and pulled without success.  I called back in frustration after my painful efforts.  Hubby explained with a carefree smile that that he had been having trouble pushing the light switch as well!  So we scooted on into the gray light without lights.

We pulled into a quiet beach that was exposed at low tide just to poke and explore and say a blessing for another day.

The beach was initially quiet and colored shells and pebbles decorated the shore.

I was just beginning to enjoy the end of the day when two energy addicted folks crossed the sunset with more enthusiasm than I have seen in quite a while.  Why am I the only one whose account is empty of energy?

I sat on a log and it groaned open mouthed.  No sympathy here.

Finally we got the sunset we were waiting for to recharge our spirit.

And just like an Olympic warrior in celebration of a great challenge hubby held the torch high as we made our way home.

The Rural Gourmet.

Yesterday, I had just finished weeding the rain garden on the grounds of the nearby museum, and since I did not look too grubby, I stopped by a grocery that I rarely use to pick up some basic food items.

During this quick visit, something caught my eye.  As I passed the freezer cases I saw white 3-gallon plastic buckets of something sitting on the bottom of the case.  My curiosity got the better of me and I paused to read the top of the label and it said simply 'pork chitterlings'.  I was not exactly sure what these are, but I did not think they were probably healthy and I was sure they were a 'southern thing'.  It is a good-old-boy county that I live in after all.

If you Google images of pork chitterlings you will get photos of what look like little gray white slimy unappetizing grubs.  If you go further in research you will see that this food, sometimes called chitlins, is pig intestines.  To be a more accurate connoisseur...they are from the SMALL intestine.  Boy that makes me feel mouth watering better.  While I feel free to denigrate this food on my blog and might assume it is the food of poor people since it was given to slaves in our early history,  my research reveals that it is eaten everywhere across the globe.  I know that the French eat strange animal body parts...but this part of the pig is eaten EVERYWHERE!  Yet I still wonder why someone would need three gallons of it!

Nutritionally these rubber tubes are high in calories from fat.  What a surprise.  They get a C- in nutritional value but since their preparation requires detailed attention due to the fact they carry salmonella and e-coli, maybe weight issues are of no concern.  After a bit of e-coli, you can be very thin.

I did read that in the U.S. a small onion is added to mitigate what might be an unpleasant odor when it is cooked.  Really.  An unpleasant odor...wonder why?  When you have to add an ONION to erase odors...well, enough said!  I do not think I will be eating these in my future.

Now before my readers put me in the food snob column, as a small child I loved pickled pigs feet and did eat them as a snack with my dad.  Of course,  we were farm folk and food was never thrown out.  But when the pigs were slaughtered, I am sure we did not eat chitterlings.  We did have our standards.

Bigger is Better(?)

(This post is not about what you are thinking so get a grip, although bigness in certain parts of our bodies is another part of the problem.)

I think it is big that has got me in my funk this month.  Everything is big these days...too big.  A bigness that is suffocating in its presence is everywhere.  In America we are big on big.  (I am also not talking about the size of our butts, but that is certainly an area we can claim as big.)  I am talking about other types of big.  Americans go to big box stores to buy...big boxes of stuff that is essential to our lives.  We then buy bigger shelves to store all our big boxes.  When we run out of shelves we rent big walk-in storage units on the other side of town to store even more of our stuff.  Stuff that we will get to someday.  Stuff that we may use someday.

Appliances are certainly bigger as is furniture.  We have to have lots of food and then larger chairs to fit those butts in place.  Even airlines are adjusting for bigger weight and bigger butts.

Prior to the housing collapse, big houses, called MacMansions and named after the Big Macs of our culture, were the dream to strive for.  I have mentioned before that I live down the road from a lottery winner and I actually think she now regrets her big foyer in her lovely mansion.  She explained to me one day that she feels intimidated when entering her own house!  When I built this house that I now live in, I was a Sarah Susanka fan.  I bought all her books.  She is an architect and the author of "Creating the Not so Big House."  She was all the rage back in 1998, which to me was not so long ago, but to the younger people ages ago. Her philosophy is to build a home that nurtures spirit rather than simply impresses with scale.  She writes about these "impersonal storage containers" we build that are "only the hollowness of the promise of bigger is better."  Anyway, I digress.

Our American society wants big in each and every way.  Our Presidential Election is now mired in big spending.   The DNC spent 70.8 million by this past June and the RNC spent 38.8 million over a similar time.  We still have months to go!  Figuring in all types of spending from those amazing super PACs on this election and the numbers come close to 2 billion dollars!  Such jaw dropping numbers must fill other countries with terrifying awe, especially since we are in the midst of a global recession.  Imagine what you or I could do with this money to improve the fate of a few citizens or perhaps an entire country!

I watched a Sundance documentary the other day about the Barnes Foundation outside of Philadelphia.  This collection of multimillion dollar art had been housed outside the city where it could be available only to those who could appreciate its beauty and rareness as an educational foundation.  The founder and owner was aghast at how rich people used art like wallpaper and he wanted to prevent that by making the art available to small groups of those who truly loved art and keeping it set in a home where it could be savored.  Upon his death the movie indicated that big philanthropists such as Pew and Annenberg (yes those good guys who had wanted to get their hands on this collection for decades) manipulated the system without using much of their money but most of their power to get the collection moved to the city where it could be housed in a new art museum paid for by the taxpayers.  I will not argue whether this was wise or philanthropic, but I will say that they were able to overcome the wishes in the owner's will and the will of those who loved and worked for years on the collection without including them in the decision making process.  They were Big rich, they influenced state politicians, and even though it went to court, they got what they wanted.  They were Big.

Do I even need to rant at all on Big corporations?   Time and our sighs as emotional fear has left the building have given us perspective.  We now know that the creation of derivatives, another name for selling junk paper, by big banks and big investment firms, are what brought this country into this horrible recession.  Time has shown that it is not the greed of the home buyers, nor the high pensions of retirees, that caused this debt.  Big Wall Street has gotten off free to continue to find new ways to fleece big money from all of us.  The dirty paper they sold to pension funds as far away as Australia and as close as your nearby city, has resulted in elected officials and board members being fined and/or sent to jail and towns becoming bankrupt, while bankers and wall street paper pushers are left to get bigger.  It is hard to follow the money trail, but it is not the greed of the little guy that started this nor finished it. 

And you can complain all you want about the subsidized food program for the poor, but Uncle Sam has made sure that Big Corporations do NOT get cut in this.

 J.P. Morgan even insults us by outsourcing their management of the Food Stamp phone bank to India because it is cheaper.

As far as I am concerned, nothing in this country is too big to fail, and Congress may even make sure it is the U.S. government that goes bankrupt if they refuse to pass budget bills this fall.  I guess they agree with me.  After all, Iceland filed criminal charges against it three Big banks and has come out on the other side way ahead of the Euro crises. 
 

"But others deem that Iceland’s purge of its financial sector has been a success. For his part, Hauksson, who hopes to finish his task by 2015, hopes that Iceland, whose economy is gradually recovering, will one day “look behind and be proud of being able to learn the lessons of the past.”

As he told Le Monde, “I don’t know of any similar procedure conducted in anywhere else the world, and our work has shown the extent to which the banking system that was put in place was a far cry from what we imagined it to be."

Now I am going to go make me a small cup of tea...it is 4:30 in the morning here!
(I have to really stop writing this way, my followers have begun to drop!)

Groaning

I have nothing to write really.  Friko would like something humorous to read, as would many bloggers, because life just seems a little too depressing right now.  But I cannot write humor at will.  My mood has a little to do with an acquaintance who's daughter fell to her death from the roof of a building in New York recently.  It was accidental as she was talking on the phone.  I also lost a distant friend who died of cancer within weeks of symptoms after a return from a vacation to Hawaii.  I was not close to either of these people which certainly does not diminish the importance of their lives in anyway nor keep their family from my thoughts.

I read on the Internet where global climate change has increased the intensity of the storms and climate scientists are now seeing moisture thrown up 60,000 feet from these storms which is blowing holes in the ozone layer of our atmosphere.  Extremely dangerous to our health.  A reality that is inconvenient to those who think it is God's will.  I think this God threw up his hands long ago and is now overseeing another planet.

I also read where climate change is causing more dangerous anomalies and  "If global warming approaches 3°C by the end of the century, it is estimated that 21-52% of the species on Earth will be committed to extinction (3). "   If you love watching your head explode over multiple graphs with bad news, read the above article from the Columbia University Earth Institute.  If not, just take my word for it...we are in deep doo-doo.

I cannot watch TV because both Presidential candidates realize that negative ads are much better than actually focusing on solutions to problems. Of course, if Obama focuses on the accomplishments he made in spite of a constipated Congress, he is accused of bragging in dire times.  And facts be damned.

The Internet is filled with discussions about schizophrenia and automatic weapons with neither side even bringing forth ideas of worth.  Banning automatic weapons...really??

There is a very good chance that food next year will cost 5% more due to the global drought.  Since I need food more than Television, I called Comcast and asked them to drop all my premium channels immediately and the sports package that my SOL added over a year ago.  (He had to watch games while he visited!)  I saved over $54.00 a month with that little move.  You can close you mouth before you catch a fly. 

On a lesser note, I planted sunflower seeds not once, but twice this summer, and lost 99% to deer, ground hogs, rabbits, and a tiny cutworm that I found at the bottom of one seedling tray.  I gave up.  No sunshiny yellow happy faces to improve my mood in the simmering days of summer.

Yes I could focus on all my many, many blessings...but right now I want to moan and groan...so shoot me.

Peace.

New Hampshire baby waterfall

Mainly Maine

Just  few of the photos so that those readers who have been so generous with their interest in my travels can get a feel of the State of Maine.

How the top 1% live in Maine where they get a view of the harbor at Bar Harbor, Maine.

A not very good photo of the red fox that was intrigued by the sound of children laughing and chasing in the nearby playground.

A public beach in Maine. Water in the ocean was still pretty cool!

John D. Rockefeller put his millions to good use by purchasing the area above Bar Harbor which became Acadia National Park.

This view in the photo above is from the highest point in Acadia looking back toward the town of Bar Harbor.

And we never were hungry as blueberries were in abundance wherever the soil was boggy enough!

Random One-Liners

Some comments (in no order as my granddaughter is talking to me industriously while I type) on the trip and also in answer to a few questions:

• No we did not take in the play on PEI as Hubbie wasn't into that so much but I bought the Anne trilogy and am going to re-read it.
• The natural area where the author grew up on PEI was small and surrounded by a golf course, which sort of took away some of the atmosphere.
• I was also a "little" disappointed at how much potato, wheat and barley agriculture covered all of the island and how little natural park area was left.
• On the other hand, PEI has lots of nice beaches and lighthouses!
• The bear sign was both a warning and temptation on the bog walk in Maine and we used it that way.
• We did see a lynx on the ski trail while walking down after riding the ski lift up in New Hampshire and it did not see us.
• We also drove by the lake where "On Golden Pond" was filmed, and it was no more lovely than all the other New Hampshire lakes.
• We did not take the zipline down from the mountain at the ski resort which was long and very fast and kind of ominous in its whine.
• I also saw a large red fox checking out the playground of children one morning outside our hotel in Maine.
• I did not see any moose, unfortunately.
• I used to not like lobster but this trip I could not get enough and due to the warm summer there was an abundance.
• We were a little sad that it was NOT much cooler as we drove north, and global warming was showing its teeth.

Signs of This Time

My trip north through Maine toward Prince Edward Island and back through New Hampshire provided lots of opportunities for photos, many of which I have deleted upon my return already.  I will not bore you with them all, but here are a few that certainly reflect the area and are very different from what I might see in my neck of the woods.

Best place for breakfast in Bar Harbor.

Great place for a lobster roll at the ferry crossing.

Quote of Lucy Maud Montgomery, author of Anne of Green Gables.  Taken where she grew up.

Enough said...or written!

There were no skiers that I could see!

We didn't, but there were plenty of places where we could!

Back!

Yep, I am back.  Up to my ears in laundry, mail and yardwork.  Those of you who travel know exactly what this means.  Adventures are great, but it is wonderful to be home even if facing lots of work and more heat.  The very last day on our return we were stuck for two hours (no exaggeration) crossing the George Washington Bridge in NY.  Only one lane was closed for repair, but that caused a major crisis it appears.  So glad I do NOT live in the city.  Going off to read all the posts I have missed and not posting for some time it appears as I have to cover as babysitter this weekend (again!).

Aloha

Just a quick decision to head up north where the weather is cooler.  First there is a visit with friend in Connecticut and then further north until we spend a few days (too few) at PEI.  Maybe we will find it compelling enough to return and spend longer time.  Of course the weather here is dropping into the high 80's!  I have not decided whether to take my laptop, so posting may not be available.  So, Aloha, which means both hello and goodbye.

Freedom

There are so many freedoms we enjoy in this country.  The freedom of the press, the freedom to assemble, the freedom to travel where we wish in this country without having to present papers at state or city border crossings, the freedom to study and read what we wish, the freedom to pursue a career, the freedom to raise a family of as many children as we wish, the freedom to speak our mind, the freedom to divorce, the freedom to marry, the freedom to live where we want, the freedom to have personal privacy protected unless warranted by authority and so many other freedoms.  But freedom is a very fragile entity and it is certainly not free.  It is the responsibility of each and every citizen to stand up for these freedoms for everyone in this country and to be fearless in doing so.

I Done Something Right

This is a post my son put on his FB page today.  He has been without power since late Friday and probably will not get power until the coming weekend.   I read his post and had to share with my Blogger friends because I think he has it right on.

 "1.6 Billion people live without electricity everyday. That's roughly a quarter of the population. You still have clean water, available food, and natural gas. Get some perspective, people. You have been coddled and lulled into a state of flacid luxury, and your complaints mock the very global humanity you ignore everyday. Likely, you have done nothing to help build the infrastructure that lets you see this very post, yet at it's first failure, you cry foul. You are standing on the shoulders of giants and complaining of the view. Be thankful for what you have, and be thankful for the crews from around the country who have come help to restore.  If you have an elderly neighbor, stop by and check on them. Take the money you are saving on electricity and consider helping others get cleaner electricity: http://www.solar-aid.org/
or help those closer to home by donating to the United way: http://www.unitedway.org/ or the Red Cross: www.redcross.org.   I hope you all are well, and am proud you have read this far. Pedestal detachment commencing."

When it rains...when is it going to rain?

When it rain it pours...or not.  I was complaining about the fires in Colorado.   The storm that roared through our area a few days ago and which has left a large number of people in Maryland and Virginia without power in 99 degree heat, passed over us around midnight without dropping much rain, downing only a few large branches, which, of course, fell directly on the one bed that seems to have survived rabbits, ground hogs and drought, and leaving us with power!  We never lost power!  Tell that to my PC.  It lost its power and is now at the Geek doctor's.  Therefore posting will be intermittent until I pay what they wish or exchange my first born.  This global warming with it increase in intensive storms and weather patterns is a bugger!

Bewildered and Wiping Away the Tears

I taught in Carson Colorado for a year many years ago.  This is just outside of the city of Colorado Springs.  I hiked and skied the nearby mountains and know the area pretty well.  I do not know people there now, but it does not diminish the tears that I am shedding for these families running from this terrible and very large fire.  I have a brother and SIL in Boulder and am hoping so hard that this fire stops soon.  Droughts and heat and an angry planet.  I have another brother outside of Fort Collins who is still safe from the fire they say they have contained.  Worry follows me everywhere these days.

The Truth Will Set You Free.

Get the facts.

Epiphany...Ask the Peanut Gallery

I just realized that I have a reasonable number of readers who slog follow along with my convoluted elaborate writing, egocentric ideas and pithy conclusions.  Not all blogs can master all three of the above as successfully as I seem to do.  So then  Therefore, I had this epiphany.  These readers, you-all, are a source of ideas, wisdom and free advice.  When I have a bold decision to make and I am beginning that journey of weighing the pros and cons on some project, I should perhaps ask the pros in the ether-sphere what they suggest.  (I want to warn you that I rarely end up taking good advice, and my life has been richly rewarded with many roadblocks along the way as a result of that.)

As I mentioned a post ago, I am in the process of replacing my 1998 Mazda 626 car.  I loved this car the day I purchased it and it has only recently been giving me difficulty.  It is in reasonably good enough condition (the photo above is not my car---my car has a few dents and dings) with >130,000 miles on it, but I am mentally ready for something a little larger and envious of all those nice new technological things like Bluetooth and GPS which will take me years to figure out how to use.  A working radio would also be a nice surprise since mine works only on and off these days.  Although I am moving away from the endless number of infant and toddler chairs that keep getting put in the back seat, as you know my son is getting married in the distant future, if mother nature agrees there will be more little grandchildren then I must keep this in mind.  So, I am keeping two of the 3 infant seats in storage!  The third goes to the church store.

I do not want to spend more than 30K and much less if I can get away with it.  I have always bought the truly lower end cars because of budget constraints---which I am sure I will get a nice nod from you-all, but this time I think I should reward myself with something a little nicer.  I spend 16,800 K on the Mazda that many years ago!   (Here she goes talking about MONEY again!)

I have researched the hybrids a little and a mechanic has told us they are a bear to fix if something goes wrong.  Therefore total electric cars are out of the picture.  I would like to buy American, but many Asian cars are really made to a great extent in America, so that broadens the picture.  I do not care about looks, but I do care about safety, reliability and comfort and a good view from that blind spot window on both sides!

If any of my readers have a car they recently purchased or know about that they love...please tell me about it in your comments.  I, in return, will give you all the free advice you want this year!

Money, Money, Money

Father's Day shone forth a clean light on my son's immediate future plans.  While we knew he was serious about this sweet woman he was dating, as parents we carefully kept the conversations to the general and casual.  He now admits that he is saving for a ring and will probably propose sometime this fall and wedding plans are most likely to occur around the 4th of July in the year ahead.  While it is a relief that he now discusses these important events so openly with us, I am now realizing I have to plan a budget as I was going to replace my car this winter.


For my daughter's wedding (which was a somewhat elaborate affair) we contributed 1/3, the in-laws 1/3 and the married couple themselves 1/3 of the cost.  My daughter's in-laws are New Jersey people and while reality television tends to overdo the colorful culture there, big weddings are a necessity it appears.  Some seemed to feel that the wedding won't hold unless there is a large crowd in a fancy hotel dancing the night away.  Therefore, her wedding was held in a fancy catholic church in Washington, DC (neither hubby nor I are Catholic) and the evening reception was held in a ballroom of one of the largest hotels in Washington, DC.  Hubby and I held the line to the lower end of the 5-figure amount which we donated, as we are much more practical and just couldn't give more without acid indigestion for a one-day ceremony.  My daughter attended another wedding that summer in New York City where the budget for the flowers alone was $50,000!  I guess it is all a matter of perspective and values and disposable income.  At that wedding, with flowers everywhere, I understand both sets of parents of the bride and groom were barely speaking to each other and the priest almost had to perform some kind of intervention.  He actually lectured both parents (in a polite way) at part of the ceremony!  Yeah, there is some satisfaction in the rich being so dysfunctional.

Maybe we were just out of touch and each generation is less conservative than the prior.  Lord knows my wedding cost less than $1,000...food, flowers, dress and all.  But I was a poor graduate student and my parents did not offer to help when I told them I was engaged.  Perhaps because I didn't want to spend what little money I had on flying home from Hawaii for a home wedding since most of my (our) friends were there at school and our first jobs were taking us even further out into the South Pacific.  Although I must admit that both of us were surprised when neither of our parents felt they could spend the time or money to attend!  Yeah this IS a tragic story of the strange ways depression era old folks lose sight of what is important, but we survived and still talked to them after we got hitched and our marriage survived without a ballroom and is now 42 years old.  Years ago my sister and her husband eloped to Vegas...so  much for ceremony there.  Yes, they are still married and could actually have afforded a huge wedding as they are both attorneys.

Anyway, I told my son we would give him the same amount of money that we gave my daughter and he could use it any way that he wished toward the wedding, honeymoon, or savings for a larger house someday.  Perhaps we should add an inflation adjustment to that?  I try to be fair, but in all honesty my daughter and her husband make lots of money while my son and his future wife do not and I tend to be more sympathetic to that.

Hubby and I are comfortable in our retirement and we can be reasonably generous, so with great thankfulness we appreciate our situation.  But I also know that money can be a poisonous thing whether you have it or not.

Falling in Love Again

Two days of intense and painful swollen neck glands and a knife sharp pain on one side of my throat when I swallow has been the way Thursday and Friday have gone for me.  Heavy doses of pain killing PM sleep drugs to get me through the two nights.  I am home alone as hubby has headed to the city for a meeting and a doctor's checkup and a toddler's graduation.  Impossible to figure out how I caught this as my exposure to small children was not intimate at the seedling booth that I worked last week and I used the bacteria wipes at the grocery store as I always do...although I did sit with hubby in a doctor's waiting room, but never touched the magazines!

I am missing the toddler's (little gal) graduation from preschool with regret but was feeling so sick the regret is small.

On the third day I ate a sweet peach for lunch and then took a long afternoon nap.  When I woke at 4:00 PM it seemed the fever had finally lessened and my throat pain was no longer impossible to endure. I could actually swallow without thinking I had a knife plunged through one of my Eustachian tubes.

I pulled myself out of bed at long last.  Thinking my weekend visit with the kids coming here may get off to a great start after all.

Then just as I stepped out of the shower and dried my hair and put on fresh new clothes my best medicine cure arrived on dancing feet.  My 6 7-year-old grandson who came back with my husband ran into the house to greet me and see how I was doing.  He has lost both of the two front top teeth and both his bottom teeth and this toothless silly smile and lispy dialogue fills me with indescribable joy.

We had a 20 minute conversation about the loss of his teeth over the last few weeks,  the economics of the loss of teeth (such as daddy dropping one of the four teeth down the sink and they calling plumber to retrieve the dropped tooth).  I certainly went wrong in not teaching my children how to remove the elbow joint beneath the sink!  Then the next tooth was lost on the playground at school.  Several green bills later the fourth tooth is left with the tooth fairy and grandson has 12 dollars in his bank!!  Then our happy conversation drifts on to Harry Potter and how at 6 he has already read a shortened version of the first book and has brought the DVD with him so that he can finish seeing the visual of the story.  I ask if it is not too scary for him, and he insists he just gets scared at certain parts like where the troll is, but he knows it is just a movie.

Then with the twists and turns of magical conversations with young folk we talk about how he used to love Thomas the Train and how that time has passed so rapidly that he has forgotten the names of many of the trains which results in a brief search on the Internet down memory lane.

Then as I lay back on my sick bed, not really feeling sick anymore, he heads off to the kitchen where grandpa is making a grilled cheese sandwich with carrot sticks and freshly picked raspberries for dessert and the chore of picking more raspberries after dinner.

Remember when you fell in love and you could not do anything without working that person's name into the conversation, or working it into doodle or a daydream?  Well, it does happen again in old age.  I am so absolutely, positively lucky that this young boy has a happy and rich life and that he loves sharing it with me!  I do not deserve this, but I will not give it back!

Thursday Thoughts #37 Everything I Need to Know I Learned in My Garden---Thursday 13 Thoughts # 36

1. I learned to accept differing points of view but to learn for myself by testing.  One man's weed is another man's treasured landscape plant.  I have purchased beautiful landscape plants from nurseries only to discover that they spread or re-seed like wildfire and then leave my yard to invade the rest of the woods.  On the other hand I have learned that one man's treasured landscape plant sometimes becomes a Prima Donna in my yard requiring too much attention.
2. I have learned to think outside the flower bed and to compromise.  Do I want butterflies or parsley?  If I plant a lot of parsley there will be some left over and then I can have both.  (Now if I can only teach that ground hog how to compromise!)
   
   
3. I have re-learned each day that change is inevitable and we all must adapt.  Some plants die, some plants are eaten to the ground and some plants get too large.  Perennial gardens are replete with changes.  Every season requires digging, moving and replacing.
4. Target your enemies so that there is minimal collateral damage.  Picking off a few or spraying very specifically for the many insects such as Japanese Beetles while carefully avoiding all other insects means less harm to those birds that are also eating the insects in my garden and less harm to those insects that are beneficial to my garden.
   
   
   
   
   
5. I have learned patience.  Plants take a long time to bring forth their reproductive beauty and instantaneous results are only for those who buy annuals in large flats.
6. Keep your place, you are not a miracle worker.  While the intermittently large plant in the foreground adds interest, planting most tall plants in the background allows everyone to show off as is the same with people.  Also, as a gardener, you need to step back once in a while and let s**t happen without beating yourself up over it.  (The voles had a vacation in my dianthus bed this spring and the rabbits have eaten 90% of my zinnias I nurtured so carefully from seed.)
   
   
   
   
   
7. Gardening is common ground.  Gardeners are wonderful people and can garden side by side even when on opposite sides of the political spectrum.  Disagreements almost always lead to compromise or changes in activity.
8. Gardening is the only reality show that I like and watch each year.  It can cost money but if you are smart and buy from local garden club plant sales and get freebies from friends, you are more likely to get better and tested plants more cheaply.
9. I have learned that fear paralyzes intelligent action.  Anger has to be provoked and many dangers are not as they seem or as you have been told.  Bumble bees and honey bees and all pollinators are so busy eating that they do not have time to sting unless you step on them or sit on them.  I can reach in and cut all the flowers I want as the bees dance around my arms.  This lesson has broader applications in life.
   
   
   
   
   
10. Deciding where to start and how to start your projects are the most important preparations you can make.  Foundation is everything.  You have to know where the sun hits your yard and when and for how long.  You have to know the soil as if it was the back of your hand.  You have to amend this soil because it is the first and last meal for your plants and no soil is perfect.
11. Opinions on style and design don't really matter.  Mother nature can pull together pink and orange and it looks perfect.  Mother nature can pull together large and small, smooth and prickly, and it always seems to fit.
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
12. Sharing is the richness in life.  If you are lucky to have something to share, be sure and do so.  Pay back is the smile on their face and the bond you have made.  Share your garden knowledge with your grandchildren, share your produce with your neighbors or the local food pantry, share your plants with new gardeners, share your time with Mother Nature.
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
13. And the most important lesson I have learned is to enjoy myself.  If I feel it is hard work, then I am doing something wrong.  Work should be a little refreshing, shouldn't it?  Maybe I just need a smaller garden.  Yes, mistakes happen. The best thing about gardening is that there is always a do-over next year.

Musically Inclined

Make sure you have your earphones on for this.
(Yes I am related to one of the artists.   If you like it softer you may like "Sadie".  If you like it edgier than listen to "Coming Attraction."  If you are from the Isles you may like "Whiskey Rose".)

An Obligatory Life Style?...Only if You Cook!

As I have written about in the past, my close neighbors own a very expensive sail boat which does not get taken out very often.  This summer they are getting ready for a month's sail around the Chesapeake Bay.  Since they are novice sailors this is a good start and I am glad to see they are using this expensive toy more often.  Boats are like fashion models in that they require a certain amount of attention, money and an unreasonable amount of maintenance.

We have another friend that lives 15 miles away on the water.  We had not been to visit their home in the time that we have known them but I kind of had an idea that it would be one of those places where various sheds are full of various project supplies, gardens and landscape beds are like fraying patchwork quilts popping up every where and the house would be spacious, welcoming, and needing lots of work.  I was not wrong, except for the rescue cat operation that I later learned about!  Since I am allergic to cats, I sent hubby on the work errand to this house.

When hubby returned I asked if they lived on the water.  He said yes and that they also had a boat at dock.  He went on to say that the motor boat was idle and had not been used in years.  It seems that the first time the owner took out the boat he had some problem that had to be fixed.  The second time he had his grandchildren for a boating day in this new boat and did not realize he had to switch on some water pump to keep the inboard engine cool and the motor eventually overheated and they had to be towed back home.  That boat has not left the dock since that event.  This is a more interesting anecdote when you learn that this man teaches classes on boating safety and the rules of the road for boaters!  He has admitted that he actually does not like boating...just helping teach others how to be safe on the water.

I often wonder how we get ourselves into these expensive hobbies which we do not really want.  It happens so often to boaters.  People retire to the water in Florida and immediately buy a boat because everyone else has a boat.  They have never been boating but dive in head first (to mix an image) and end up with a headache that taunts them every morning.  Living on the water and enjoying the view does not mean one has to boat or sail.  Living on a golf course does not mean one has to enjoy golf.  Maybe you just like a perfectly "manigroomed" back yard view.  Living on the side of a mountain with a snowy view does not mean you have to ski just because all of your neighbors ski.  Surely you will find other things you enjoy with them such as apres ski warm drinks.  Living in the lively city doesn't mean you have to eat out all the time...maybe you just want coffee and like people watching.  Living in the country does not mean you have to farm!

I think we try to fit our personal round pegs into those lovely square holes that we find without taking time to test the hole.  We think we need to be exactly like everyone around us.  But we don't.  EXCEPT, I will never understand people who have huge gourmet kitchens with every perfect appliance and tool and yet they rarely cook!