Wednesday, December 27, 2017

Do You Have a Clue?

Taking a photo of a wood orchid a few years ago.

One of the real problems that I (and most of us) have is understanding each other. It is hard to see the big picture when you know the people involved only somewhat superficially. Just because you work with them and see them maybe monthly at meetings or because you run into others three times a year at one of your daughter's project events, or you chat with someone on a regular shopping trip to a retail outlet, this does not mean you have even a clue about them, about their challenges, beliefs, prejudices, history and/or motivations.  This is because the yardstick by which you measure these encounters is YOUR yardstick.  The nicks and faded numbers on it are from your experiences and your wins and losses.


Our current cultural shift has seemed to drain the swamp of empathy as we are told that most people do not deserve anything they have not earned.  So, I try to work harder at this understanding of people and not come into relationships with pre-conceived opinions of where they get their opinions...

But I do need some help on this one:

I post my photos regularly on Facebook.  I post my photos (the ones that I am most pleased with) on a less regular basis on an Australian website that sells digital art.  I have sold maybe two dozen items and made enough money on all of them for dinner out for two at a nice restaurant.  Clearly, I would have starved as a digital artist.  I only mention this to illustrate that I do take this a little seriously.  As the year progresses I may have hundreds of photos on Facebook.  These go into albums such as family, trips, and my yard, etc.  At the end of the year, I begin to clean all this up both for personal privacy reasons and to protect my artistic work and to just be able to keep track of what is posted and what is not.  The more artistic photos I will post in lower resolution on the off chance that someone would 'steal' them.  My friends ask if they can use them for odd things and I always let them copy and re-use so it is not a hard rule.  

So, now for your challenge and response.  I recently deleted a bunch of photos and posted on FB that I was cleaning up my albums getting ready for 2018.  One of my virtual friends (He is very smart, very opinionated, and I do not know him very well. He worked IT and I rarely saw him when we worked at the same company.) went off on a tangent.  He was furious that I was deleting photos and he said he was not going to comment in the future on my photos if I deleted them, etc.  I commented that I was sorry, but that was the way it was.  I went on in my life and last week decided to re-read that conversation as I was still mystified and the thread was gone!  He had deleted it.  Weird.  I do not care about this person.  We are never meeting in real life.  I am just curious about what would make a person think he had control over anothers' creative work?  Why would he care that his comments on my photos (which were short and flattering and mostly just LIKES) would be gone forever?

Where is Miss Manners when you need her advice?

17 comments:

  1. Makes me wonder if he was using them for something of his own. No, in my opinion, you owe him nothing and as my youngest grandson would say "he is a big poopy head," and arrogant.

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  2. I’m with Celia. You owed him nothing. It was your property to do with as you wish. He must have been using them himself. Otherwise, why would be care?

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  3. It does seem that people are getting evermore touchy these days.

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  4. Some people seem to think that their every word online is to be taken seriously and left there forever. No, i don't get it at all.

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  5. I am baffled. As you know, I post a lot of photos too, and I have not given much thought to where they end up once I put them out there. I am perhaps naive about what they could be used for. But what is it to this guy if you delete them? Are you destroying art? No. I'm sure you have any original photos you want to keep in your photos files. Is he "borrowing" them? Losing him as a Facebook friend or whatever seems to be not much of a loss.
    And thanks for reminding me that I really need to clean up my photo files.

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  6. I don't put much on Facebook, just a picture now and then but I also wonder if he is just a troll, looking to stir things up for no good reason. I'd deep six him. :-)

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  7. Hum?? Sounds like a crazy person.

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  8. I can't speculate on why the fact that you were deleting your photos from your page upset him so, can't even remotely come up with a reason for that, but I imagine he deleted his comments because he regretted them or at least regretted that they were public. I've deleted comments that I have made on posts, thinking in retrospect that it either reflected my ignorance or because I decided it would have been better left unsaid.

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  9. I don't get it, but then there is very little about FaceBook that I do get.

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  10. To me, that makes no sense for him to attack you over that. Basically, though a lot of the meanness on the Internet makes no sense to me. I'd take them off and consider yourself lucky he only quit following you. He might be back anyway.

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  11. Tabor, watch this page for Bald Eagle's new nestlings. My sister told me about it and I am addicted to the live cam feed. http://www.dickpritchettrealestate.com/eagle-feed.html

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    Replies
    1. Thanks! I will. This is the time of year for the raptors.

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  12. That's a very odd reaction indeed. I don't quite understand it, but we are in the mindset of taking quick offence at anything possible.

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  13. The Facebook environment to many is as good as person to person relationship including the appropriate emotional attachment. Missing photos can be sad, shocking, upsetting. Also, if a person shares, then a missing photo might show up as that gray triangle thing that appears more alarming that it should.

    In summary, complaining about a real person known online or in person whether you care about the or not, that isn't a high profile celebrity of some sort, is not cool. I feel bad posting this because I like your blogs, and respect the online person I know you as through my lens. This very type situation is dear to me, people posting bad about others. His deleting his mistake, I believe, is a clue worth following.


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    1. And this is why I blog anonymously. I do not want those I know to misunderstand or to follow me on my blog. On Facebook I am careful what I say...unless I am on a political rant. Which I sometimes am!

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    2. Ah, I see. Thank you for the explanation.
      Happy Almost New Year!

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  14. Yes, you rant, that's ok tho as we love you anyway.
    He loves your work, that's at the core of his reaction. You are taking something beautiful away forever. Then he over reacted and deleted his comment.
    I too mourn the loss of your art online. But..it's not my place to care if you take it away or not.

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Take your time...take a deep breath...then hit me with your best shot.