Playing along with Words for Wednesday.

I got my "Words for Wednesday" prompt from Messymimi who got them from the link provided on River at Drifting Through Life.  This Wednesday's words are:

1. passport 2. movies 3. puffed 4. complete 5.transport and 6. bleach. 

 The "and/or" second set is  1. avenue 2. helicopter 3. fair 4. clearly 5. foolishness and 6. ability

My effort at something creative using  the words is below...if you feel like joining in check at Messymimi above:

"The rising sun hit the window bleaching the sky across the desert: this piercing sun and the jerky transport of the train shook me awake. I immediately placed my hand reassuringly on my passport as I began to clear my head. It was winter, but the calm weather should have dissuaded my foolish thoughts about the helicopter not being there at journey’s end. I fingered the folder paper and re-read the directions which clearly stated I was to catch a cab at Avenue E by 10:00 A.M..  I had experienced this kind of foolishness only in the movies, and while life is not fair I had somehow thrown myself into the unfairness of something odd and frightening just to see if I had the ability to prove my love and complete my possible destiny. As we slowed pulling into the station I saw the steam from the brakes feather the air against my window, puffed clouds naturally reminding me I needed a cigarette."

Paperwork and Brain Fog

Aging is supposed to be something we accept with grace as the trade-off for living a longer life, and other than a few "dammit"s  now and again, I think I am dealing with it as best I can. 

As mentioned in a post a while back, we are planning a lengthy trip to China. We used to live in Asia and traveled to a number of Asian countries.  While I had not been to China over my life, I avoided such a trip wanting instead to place resources, time and money, to learn more about Europe.  Recently, my sister and sister-in-law encouraged us to join them on a China adventure and wanting to spend time with my relatives who live so far away, I decided to spend the money. The trip requires completion of a 4-page visa including attaching a few other documents and copies of documents. The trip organizer also included a rather lengthy set of instructions for all the paperwork. I put it off over the holidays. In January my sister sent me an email wondering if we had made our plane reservations since we needed to do that before filling out the Visa.   For some reason, I thought this was also a reminder to hurry and get Visa stuff done.  Another example of aging since I panic and do not think things through and do not ask for clarification as I plod forward.  We made our plane reservations a few weeks ago.

It took me three days to complete the Visa application (which is valid for ten years - China really loves us!).  I would spend three hours each morning and then put it aside for my sanity's sake.  I kept making mistakes because I realized that I was just filling out the PDF and not reading the directions on how and what to fill out!  As I age, I think I know more than I know and I hate the tediousness of directions anyway.  I used to be more careful about directions, but now I like plug and play stuff far more or resort to bribery to get someone else to do it.  Finally, I started to re-complete the application by reading whole sections of the directions.  That improved my accuracy slightly when I reviewed both of our sets of papers.   Finally, on the third day of this nightmare and after a few emails from my two sisters, I went through the application step by step, line by line. (For some reason in our inclusion of all the hotels and dates, they do not want to see you are going to Tibet - Political? - so we followed those directions and I omitted information on that stop.) Thank goodness this is all done electronically or I would have wasted reams of paper and expensive toner ink.  I scanned our driver's licenses, attached a check, completed the return address form and tucked in our passports.

I was sooooo proud of myself that I poured a glass of wine.  That afternoon I drove to the drugstore and bought a FANCY stiff envelope for mailing of the paperwork including our passports to a service that will do all the running around at the Chinese Embassy as well as send whatever is necessary to our travel company.  They said it could take up to 6 weeks for processing, so I should be sure we did not need our Passports before that time.   No problem!

Today I got an email from one of my sisters explaining that we should not send the stuff off more than 6 months ahead of the trip!  This would be seven months ahead of time when I counted my mailing.  I am hoping they will give me a pass...please.  If they send it back in a week or so, I will just have to return it, because it will then be in the correct time frame. (I actually expected them to send them back for some minuscule error anyway.)

I think sitting around all winter and passively watching birds, passively taking photos, passively eating carbs, and passively binge-watching TV in the evenings has overcome the blood-gorged pathways that send nutrition to my synapses when I ran the elliptical and lifted my weights two or three times a week.  You can't win.

The Giant Night and the Devil Moon

Sleep is a big deal in our society. Lack of sleep is also a big deal and has generated 1,000s of articles discussing causes, cures, temporary or permanent relief and so on. My husband sleeps like a full-bellied infant. I sleep like a watchful night guard. I can drift off to sleep usually fairly easily, but if I get a tickle in my throat or on my foot or hear my husband snort a few times I am awake and must start the relaxing process all over again.

My bedroom is well-designed for the end of a busy day. The only distractions are small and medium stacks of books in regimental rows, along with two e-readers and the landline and a clock radio on the end tables. I work at keeping the bedroom as zen as possible, to the point that I took down a bunch of pictures a few years ago and have not got around to replacing them with something more sleep-inducing. I still need to add some small photos or art to the wall at the foot of the bed.

I work at this because I have periods of insomnia. I avoid alcohol, caffeine, and sugar in the evening. I read my Kindle on the non-blue light mode; I do not read the news or social media or text friends and family.  I keep to a routine as much as possible and being retired this is 90% possible.  I keep plants in the bedroom in the winter to purify air and create a non-wintery mood.  In the photo above the plants are on a stand in the window behind me as I take this photo.  About the only thing I do not have is a noise machine.

Good sleep for an individual can range from 6 hours to 9 hours a night depending on the individual and his/her metabolism.  My fitbit does tell me I average 7.5 most nights.  Please note the first two items on the list below are Friday...I guess I really caught up with a nap, although I know for a fact I did NOT nap that long, my naps rarely lasting more than 30 to 45 minutes.  Maybe I was just reading and lying VERY STILL?

Some doctor's say that insomnia is a psychiatric disorder.  I am not that willing to submit to that.  I think it is chemical, but then chemistry impacts our psychiatric response to things, so who knows.

I have noticed that full moons are usually a trigger for my sleeplessness.  I close my non-blackout curtains but still seem to find myself wide awake around 2:00 A.M.  I lie restless for 20 minutes while my mind goes through a roller coaster of 100's of subjects, issues, problems, etc.  Eventually, I throw back the blankets and get up to find some way to fall back asleep again.

Two nights ago I was mocked by the full moon.  It seems to want to "parhteee" in the black and piercing, cold, winter air while all is still and oh so quiet.

I have no desire to dance. I feel like a zombie and am just thankful I do not have anything on my schedule for the next day!

I put on my slippers and take my camera outside.  I forget to check the settings and in the dark attempt a few photos with no tripod but also no shakey caffeine drug.

While it is indeed freezing the water is not and dances with the moon to the quietest of waltzes.  At least the moon has some company.  It is light enough that I could go for a walk without a flashlight.

Eventually, the cold seeps into my hands and shoulders and I cannot control the shake of the camera and get the watery photo above.  I look to the inviting warmth of the light through my kitchen window.

It is time to go inside.  Maybe I can wrap myself again in blankets and warm slowly to a coziness and finally get the sleep I deserve!

Social on Unsocial Media

There are days, especially those short and gray and cold winter days, when I spend too much time on Facebook, reading and laughing at memes...you know what those are, right? I also get a peek at the lives of the very few people I have met only peripherally but who I friended because I knew them through Blogger for years.  (I do not friend friends-of-friends unless I know them.)  I am able to throw rotten apples at those elected officials that are really rotten at the core (pun intended), and I throw more incisive comments at my elected officials that are walking too moderate a line and I hit the like or love button for those elected officials (mostly not mine) who are carrying a torch for Democracy, freedom of speech and transparency.

I follow friends I have made that live hundred and thousands of miles from me.  I  watch their children grow and have children of  their own.  If it was not for FB I  would not be  able to follow their lives as closely.

I also post photos that are manipulated slightly or greatly because it is an addiction that I have to share.  I love the play of light and color and shape and shadow.  I post these photos whether they are worthy or not, because I am moving through my 70th decade and do not give a ####.

My son is no longer on FB because he has serious and difficult issues in his life and FB  can be a dangerous sink-hole when you are trying to get your life together.  Most people are just trying to get through the day when they post a photo of their breakfast or their good-looking barista.  Others are posting the best of their life and making it all look so easy.  A few are honest and post both the lows and highs.

My daughter is  on FB and posts just a few photos of her many travels with family or the girl's weekend stuff that women her age post.  All of them are in perfect shape and dressed fashionably whether on the thin or chunky side with perfect glossy hair and a glass of  wine or a plate of dessert in the foreground.  It is hard to be a 40 something I am thinking!  She is not shallow as she posts rarely,but ... she sometimes posts the family skiing, or cheering, or concerting, or attending a sports event...you get the idea.

My sister and brothers will rarely comment on anything and never post.  I comment more on their kid's posts.  I am young at heart.

My daughter comments every so often on my posts.  But I  cannot tell you how it makes my heart sing when she asks about a photo, a bird photo, and asked its ID!  She did this today and my heart just bloomed.  She does not care about birds as I do and the very fact that she noticed certainly made me feel like I had just been sucked  into her planetary orbit ever so briefly as she rushes off on her hundreds of errands and meet-ups in other space dimensions.

Some Days...

Some days there are flowers and some days they are forgotten. Today is a flower day.

Happy Valentine's Day. Love someone today. Throw a kiss to the bird on the tree or pat your neighbor's dog or kiss someone...anyone.