Sunday, February 17, 2019
Social on Unsocial Media
There are days, especially those short and gray and cold winter days, when I spend too much time on Facebook, reading and laughing at memes...you know what those are, right? I also get a peek at the lives of the very few people I have met only peripherally but who I friended because I knew them through Blogger for years. (I do not friend friends-of-friends unless I know them.) I am able to throw rotten apples at those elected officials that are really rotten at the core (pun intended), and I throw more incisive comments at my elected officials that are walking too moderate a line and I hit the like or love button for those elected officials (mostly not mine) who are carrying a torch for Democracy, freedom of speech and transparency.
I follow friends I have made that live hundred and thousands of miles from me. I watch their children grow and have children of their own. If it was not for FB I would not be able to follow their lives as closely.
I also post photos that are manipulated slightly or greatly because it is an addiction that I have to share. I love the play of light and color and shape and shadow. I post these photos whether they are worthy or not, because I am moving through my 70th decade and do not give a ####.
My son is no longer on FB because he has serious and difficult issues in his life and FB can be a dangerous sink-hole when you are trying to get your life together. Most people are just trying to get through the day when they post a photo of their breakfast or their good-looking barista. Others are posting the best of their life and making it all look so easy. A few are honest and post both the lows and highs.
My daughter is on FB and posts just a few photos of her many travels with family or the girl's weekend stuff that women her age post. All of them are in perfect shape and dressed fashionably whether on the thin or chunky side with perfect glossy hair and a glass of wine or a plate of dessert in the foreground. It is hard to be a 40 something I am thinking! She is not shallow as she posts rarely,but ... she sometimes posts the family skiing, or cheering, or concerting, or attending a sports event...you get the idea.
My sister and brothers will rarely comment on anything and never post. I comment more on their kid's posts. I am young at heart.
My daughter comments every so often on my posts. But I cannot tell you how it makes my heart sing when she asks about a photo, a bird photo, and asked its ID! She did this today and my heart just bloomed. She does not care about birds as I do and the very fact that she noticed certainly made me feel like I had just been sucked into her planetary orbit ever so briefly as she rushes off on her hundreds of errands and meet-ups in other space dimensions.
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I spend quite a bit of time on Facebook too and joined some groups there, one for Eastenders TV show, one for Anthony Trollope, one for I love British TV, etc. I don't post photos of family online, just to maintain privacy for them. Like you I click like and comment to show support.
ReplyDeleteI am in and out of Facebook and also limited my 'friend' list to those I know in RT and writers/readers who are part of groups where I feel safe. I don't allow mine to go to friends of friends as so many play games there (I don't) and don't have any idea who the people are on their list. I like it for keeping track of what's going on with people I like or believe I would if I met them. I don't like it for the political stuff and often have to snooze someone where I'd like to know how they're doing but their angry or fearful posts bring me down. I don't need anybody's help to bring myself down. My kids are almost never on FB but I have a niece who I've gotten to know better through her posts than i had through the times I'd been with her.
ReplyDeleteI find FB occasionally interesting, esp. when it comes to family, but also very distracting and sometimes a frustrating theft of time. Try to limit to 10 or 15 min. every few days.
ReplyDeleteGood look at FB, how it flows through people's lives. Being noticed by one's love ones is huger than huge. You put it so well.
ReplyDeleteI can relate completely to this post!
ReplyDeleteI'm on FB mostly to keep up on the art glass world and for news from varied sources. there have been times when I waste far too much time and others when I barely check in. I'm sort of off right now as it's either boring, repetitive, or too depressing.
ReplyDeleteWell done, Tabor. I'd like to be your FB friend, but frankly it seems like I get all I really need about you and your life from your wonderful blog! I don't need any reason to be on FB any more often than I am right now. :-)
ReplyDeleteFacebook too often leads to people comparing their own movie to others' highlight reels.
ReplyDeleteI opened a FB account, but don’t use it as as simply dslike and don’t trust the way it’s administered. I don’t Twitter either. I spend enough time, maybe too much, on the Internet with my blog, I think.
ReplyDeleteI check FB several times a day but don't have an extensive group of 'friends' and don't spend a lot of time at any one sitting. It's good for community groups, I find.
ReplyDeleteI have a FB account. I probably check it about three time a year. I worry about spending too much time on blogs as it is. Maybe I really don't have an addictive personality if there is such a thing?
ReplyDeleteI don't do facebook. And I do worry about privacy. Sometimes I think that if we all lived in a small town, we'd know each other's business. As far as blogging, I think of it as having penpals. Andrea
ReplyDeleteI so hope she reads your blog too.
ReplyDeleteNOPe...that is kept from family in case I want to vent about personal stuff...as I sometimes do. Maybe it will be like the diaries that granny left behind when I am gone from this earth.
DeleteI am not on any social media. All this baring of soul is ok in just the one place, my blog where I am fairly honest. There are fewer people to know about me and nobody who really knows who and where I am. FB is being called so many nasty names at the moment - in Europe anyway- that it might not survive in its current format.
ReplyDeleteI know that. They have created a very strange and powerful giant and it may implode, although I will be sad.
DeleteI have have to hate FB and rarely post anything.
ReplyDeleteWell picking and choosing what items appear on my timeline is on the whole interesting, something funny, something arty and something newsworthy. My family hardly ever post anything but use it all the same for quick messages. Of course it has out grown itself and hosts some terrible things but I have never come across any.
ReplyDelete