For instance, I am so emotionally high with my grandchildren. While I love my children, I do not remember my heart bursting with joy every time I saw them. Perhaps that was, because I saw my children every day and the reality is you see them clean and dirty, calm and emotional, happy and angry, energetic and tired? They see you the same and are not always willing to share or even want to spend time with you.
My grandchildren, in my case, are seen maybe every other month, and the older ones are on their best behavior (lucky me). The baby is most times, but even when crying she is precious and vulnerable. She also changes dramatically from week to week and she now crawls around the room.
As for long-ago memories, I remember bits and pieces while my husband, who has been diagnosed with "mild cognitive impairment", remembers every detail of his youth...or it seems that way.
Also, my personality wants to slow down, and maybe think on past memories, while my husband wants passionately to make new ones while talking endlessly about past events.
We had a visit from a friend this past week who we have known for many years. She came with her second husband who has been diagnosed with Parkinson's disease and for whom a two-hour car trip (which this was) is a big challenge. He was quiet and pleasant, which is the same as his former peonality. He is slow and unstable. She is full of plans, building her next new house and running her small farm with a new chicken house being built, and training her dogs for dog shows, which is the same as her former personality. Yet, they live happily on these two planes of existence and seem to be able to meet in the middle.
I do think age has given me a clearer perspective on time and the passage o time and my life in that spectrum. Perhaps. (These sunsets were taken last night as a big acold front moved in. That high cloud makes for great light bounce.)
Interesting to think about
ReplyDeleteIn contrast, not traveling greatly limits my seeing family and friends. There are times when I wonder if the World is still out there and not just a TV broadcast.
I just spent a delightful afternoon with a granddaughter in her early 20's. I have both sons and several grandkids within 3 miles of me and we have a big family dinner most weeks. MY sisters live 300 miles away and it's only the youngest who still travels. The rest of the time is much like Salty Pumpkin describes it.
ReplyDeleteI came to the conclusion that most of our memories are almost entirely figments of imagination. I get together with my three siblings who are all big into reminiscing and I think we surely grew up in parallel universes.
ReplyDeleteAs we age, we adapt or life is miserable. It is good to see people adapting and doing ok.
ReplyDeleteThe grands are great, especially when they’re young. When they become teenagers they adore you less. 🤓
ReplyDeleteI could have used your sky last evening. Our sunset was very minimal to say the least. And I had to suffer through cold even to get that.
I agree that age brings changes to my memories. And you're right that some of our loved ones seem to have been in a completely different universe than mine! I am just grateful that I can remember so much, at my advanced age. :-)
ReplyDeleteMy grands, at 17 and 19, are loving but not adoring. They are busy becoming their own persons.
ReplyDeleteMy memories are quite different from my two years younger sister. But our personalities are also quite different.
Mine are as well. Older and becoming adults in their ow lives.
DeleteAn interesting post, Tabor...giving me much food for thought.
ReplyDeleteTake good care. :)
I'll take your word about grandchildren. My Sweetie also remembers extreme detail from his childhood, and i remember only bigger events.
ReplyDeleteI think we love our grands differently because we don't have to parent them. Our job as grandparents is to love and indulge them and then hand them back to their parents. At least that's what I think. My husband has never been a very active type but has gotten even lass active as he has aged to his detriment. I'm still very active since everything that involves taking care of stuff or physical labor has fallen to me. If I don't do it, it doesn't get done. He's decided though, at least for now, after his illness that maybe being inactive wasn't the best for health that he thought it was.
ReplyDeleteI think of my life like having been reincarnated many times in this one lifetime. It's amazing sometimes to think back that that was me. I tried to register here by my name.. didn't work lol Rain Trueax
ReplyDeleteI'm always happy to see our Grandkids..and the one great granddaughter. We don't get to see them so much anymore...life.
ReplyDeletehugs
Donna
Every family visit causes my heart to burst with joy...the children, my god-children, my grandchildren, my siblings and on and on. Now I am just hoping for a great-grandchild someday soon but my married grandchildren are too busy filling their lives with success.
ReplyDeleteAs I get older I enjoy going over past trips I have made because we don't want to go on long trips anymore. I enjoy reliving the past experiences. My grandsons are very noisy and a lot more difficult to raise than my two daughters but I love them dearly.
ReplyDeleteI actually felt guilty when my younger son recently visited that, while it was great to see him again, my loving attention was totally on my grand-daughter. I often feel that I treat my children as merely the vessels that brought my grandchildren to me. I don't remember my mother giving me that feeling. Maybe my memory is selective. OK, I know it is.
ReplyDeleteI actually felt guilty when my younger son recently visited that, while it was great to see him again, my loving attention was totally focused on my grand-daughter. I sometimes feel I regard my children as merely the vessels that brought me my grands. I don't remember my mother making me feel that way. Maybe my memory is selective. OK, I know it is.
ReplyDeleteHi Tabor, Just checking to see if the comment I left yesterday has appeared. Pauline
ReplyDeleteHello...very interesting blog. I follow you.
ReplyDeleteLots to think about. I think my grandparents were better parents to me than their daughter but having lived through parenting once they may have learned a thing or two...Do you think grandparenting is easier than parenting??
ReplyDeleteYou are so lucky to see your grandchildren every month. Sigh...
ReplyDelete