We used to wear long dresses that flowed with feminine movement and swirled with a flirtatious swish sometimes just revealing those sexy ankles that drew a man's attention.
We paint our lips to emphasize their plump juiciness and outline out eyes to give an exotic deepness to them waiting for the male to just dive in.
We paint our nails to draw attention to our delicate hands that we want held.
I have become dismayed (not depressed) that I no longer have the attributes that I would like more closely inspected. Hands are veined with tan spots, lips are still plump but losing their shape, my neck is thin skinned and freckled and my decolletage, while still there, is not youthful looking nor sustained without assistance. I still wear jewelry and make-up, and sometimes paint my nails, but realize it is being done for me, myself, and I. Hubby still loves me even in muddy canoe pants and only misses my long hair which he has for years. He, while commenting nicely if I get dressed up, really has seen me without the camouflage and knows me like no other.
Yet having a bit of the soul of the artist, I do miss that smoothness and symmetry of youth, not to flirt, but to add beauty and a bit of power to my day. Yes, age has its beauty, but I tend to be drawn to the other less complicated form.
There, now that I have depressed most of my female readers over the age of 50, I am glad to read in the weather report that the snows are melting this week and we may even get shirt weather! Spring is around the corner and not around the bend.
You haven't depressed me - you've given me validation. Yes, I still feel naked going anywhere without earrings and have been known to put on eye make-up before going out to weed the garden.
ReplyDeleteNow I do it because my appearance is directly connected to my attitude. If I look too awful I tend to be a bit grumpy.
After a point it really becomes a manifestation of self, how we feel about ourselves. I find that as I get older I'm less interested in vapid young faces and prefer lines of life and wisdom.
ReplyDeleteThere's no denying that I'm still vain at nearly 71, but looking "good" seems to take minimal time now and may be up for interpretation. My husband, my kids, and especially my grandchildren tell me when I look "nice." Mostly, however, I'm satisfied to take a shower, put on a smear of gloss to protect my lips, clip my nails short, and get on with it. No cream or potion is going to restore my youth, so I might as well take some credit for the wrinkles!
ReplyDeleteI wear the jewelry, put on nice clothes, and paint my face for me. I love living in my Fantasyland. I no longer have to impress, but I do have to feel good about myself.
ReplyDeleteYour description of the attributes we use to attract .. .. whom? .. males? made me laugh. I always wore jewellery because I like it. I always dressed in clothes that suit me, I always managed to draw attention to myself, in a mild way, but I never blamed my (sometimes) red nails.
ReplyDeletePleasing myself has always come first. I have never lacked male attention, even though my first objective has never been to please a man.
Even today, old and wrinkly, with everything gone south and still slipping, I find that men like my company. I firmly believe it’s more to do with personality than all the artifice available to deck ourselves out like a peacock.
There is no greater compliment than to hear my granddaughters say that their gram is awesome. I try to keep up with fashion, exercise and keep as young as I can under the circumstances. Aging is no fun, but dwelling on it doesn't help anything or anyone, especially not yourself.
ReplyDeleteAge is freeing. While I don't "let myself go", I no longer bother with make up day to day. Moisturizer is it.
ReplyDeleteI seldom dress up. I accessorize my jeans and tee shirts with fun jewelry purchased while traveling. I may be one of the few women on earth who does not wear earrings - never had my ears pierced. I am an outdoorsy person and the natural look is fine with me. i no longer need to impress anyone.
If i dress up, it's because i want to, for me. As for the gray hair that i refuse to cover, i've earned every one of them, from my children!
ReplyDeleteIt is an issue when we live in a world like ours where youth and beauty are admired and age-- not so much. I sometimes think how amazing it is that I was once that person and now am this person. I used to put a lot more into looking good and now it's not worth it to me. I don't even think that's because I can't. It's because I don't care enough to want to.
ReplyDeleteI still wear earrings, I like them but as for the rest nope. Hanging out in my jeans and tees, long sleeve tees in the winter. Got a couple pair of dress slacks. Long reach from when I had a closet of suits and heels and a bathroom full of makeup. Don't miss it. I think someone with a big smile on their face has exactly the makeup they need.
ReplyDeletein my second year of semi-retirement, i still have not figured out how i want to present myself. if i skip the makeup (just tinted moisturizer, blush, & mascara), i look old and tired. i'm just not used to seeing myself like that, so usually opt for the makeup. earrings are just always there - the tiny gold spheres i've worn most of my adult life. besides, my messy hair hides them anyway!
ReplyDeleteI remember the odd days that I "forgot" to apply make-up prior to leaving the house for work usually because the morning routine was messed up by one thing or another. I'd get to work and the only one who noticed that I hadn't applied make-up was myself. Who do we dress up for - ourselves, other women, or the other sex? I think it depends upon the day.
ReplyDeleteSpring? Vanity never was my forte...except for my long neck. Long gone neck. I still wear goo ga's, I too miss my long hair, and my decolletage is now as wrinkled as the rest of me. Ah, well. Even fat wrinkles.
ReplyDeleteNo, you have not depressed me. I am coming to terms with these things, and glad to discuss it openly. You have it about right.
ReplyDeleteALOHA from Honolulu
ComfortSpiral
=^..^=
I miss my old younger face. Maybe some sunshine on it will liven things up.
ReplyDeleteThe make-up I can see as trying to attract a male but I only wore make-up in high school, choosing not to wear any after graduation. never was one much for personal adornment myself, didn't like the way nail polish felt so have never worn it. I thought we all dressed for women, not men. I was often outshone by the women in their make-up, jewelry, and clothes (not enough boob for me to have any kind decolletage) but even so, I found it fairly easy to attract men. I'm perfectly happy to leave all that to the younger set now.
ReplyDeleteI recently met a woman of my age who is holding the line. But it's constant work. Not for me.
ReplyDelete