As I have reached elderhood I find the time to absorb and think about the things that happen in my life can be a bit exhausting and less energizing. When I was younger it was easier to throw off stuff that happened that was emotional without pondering and move on to the many activities of my day ahead and only look back on the event after weeks when the wounds of the event had healed.
Yesterday after spending the weekend with the grandchildren we got ready to leave for home and Xman hugged his grandfather goodbye and then refused to hug me and with an evil grin ran into the next room to play. We had had a wonderful weekend together, so his obstinacy was not understood. I tried to be an adult and not let my feelings be hurt by this and gathered my coat and bag. I kissed my little grandaughter good bye and she was full of wet sloppy kisses and sweet smiles.
We headed for the door upstairs and as we all gathered for one last adieu the little gal threw herself on the floor and began wailing. When daddy picked her up with her eyes filled with tears as she opened her arms begging me to stay.
It was hard to determine which grandchild created the greater pain in my heart or made me want to cry more!
G'day ....I find quite the opposite, the older I get the easier it is to wear life like a loose garment.
ReplyDeleteTo set myself aside from the goings on of daily life and to observe my reactions, which have so often originated out of an old bruise(s) from long ago and have very little to do with today.
Your grandson ...was probably just playing you ...find a way to play him back ...with humour.
And above all else leave any lingering pain where it belongs ..
in yesterday.
Much love ...
SL you are so right. It just seems that when I was busy I had less time to think about stuff.
ReplyDeleteI totally relate! Out of nowhere my granddaugher Hope did not want to visit us the last time her brother Michael visited. I tried to entice her with all the fun things we had done before and she said, "I don't like your macaroni and cheese. It is not as good as mama's." Thankfully I know she was grasping at straws to make sure she could stay with her mama. They love us but sometimes their anxiety over missing home is greater than their desire to be spoiled rotten.
ReplyDeleteI have six bio grandkids and every single one of them has done that to me at least once. They realize it is a way to get a rise out of you, but it also may be a way for him to get past his feelings about your going away. (If I pretend I don't care - maybe it won't hurt)
ReplyDeleteTabor I have had this done to me.
ReplyDeleteNo matter how I try - it still hurts. I feel I am being childish.
I understand. When the older grandchildren do something similar to this - it hurts just as bad.
Maybe this grandma needs to grow up. I am still learning.
Since I live in a different state than my granddaughters I don't see them very often. I have been hurt by the oldest one several times. I had to ask her to come tell me goodbye the last time I was there, even though she was in the next room and knew I was leaving. I felt like she was happy to see me go. I tried to not let it hurt, but it did. The next time I said goodbye to her (when she visited me)it was a different story. Sometimes they are just focusing on something that has nothing to do with how they feel about you.
ReplyDeletehe probably just wanted some control. the fact that he grinned showed he was enjoying his power a little! maybe he dosn't always feel he has control and this was an easy way to get a little! could he have been a little jealous of his sister's attention over the weekend? he used to be the only light of your life...now he has to share. he certainly knew how to get a huge amount of attention, didn't he? his refusing a hug still has your attention and you are not even there with him. smart little boy!
ReplyDeleteOh....I can so understand what you are feeling. I totally agree with what Kenju wrote. That makes a lot of sense to me...
ReplyDeleteRoller Coaster ride, indeed!
Hang on!
xoxo
I know exactly what you mean....the grandsons are stand-offish with Meme sometimes, but Lily showers me with hugs and kisses. it must be a guy thing...
ReplyDeleteI too agree with kenju. They do not want to say goodbye.
Oooh. Not fun. My first thought was with Sky. Xman was jealous of his sister. I'll have to ask my sister(s) and coworkers about this one.
ReplyDeleteMy first thought is what Kenju expressed. It was an effective way of avoiding the hurt of saying goodbye - particularly since you had a great time together. I suspect he'll smother you with kisses upon your next meeting.
ReplyDeleteI think all young kids do that from time to time. I am sure he loves you just as much as he loves his grandpa. I to would get a little hurt.
ReplyDeleteWow! That's like the Sophie's Choice of grandmother love.
ReplyDeleteI remember when my sons left home feeling the strangeness of sadness and pride existing together.