Sunday, June 07, 2020

Neighbors, Ya Can't Pick Them!

"The more we can be in a relationship with those who might seem strange to us, the more we can feel like we're neighbors and all members of the human family."Fred Rogers

My neighborhood has changed dramatically these last few years.  It is a small upper middle class (not to be skewed by the lottery winner third house down) neighborhood.  We are very rural with only seven <4 acre lots on our side of the street and 4 lots on the other and one empty lot at the cul de sac.  Actually, there are 3 empty lots and one that is expensive will never be buildable as it is not able to perk.  More about that later.

Anyway, out of the eight homes that were here when we built on our lot about 13 years ago,  four of those original neighbors have sold and moved away.   We are pretty good friends with our neighbors on the left side of us but they are gone 6-7 months of the year to Florida.  They have HUGE home and I anticipate they will want to live permanently in Florida as they age and time goes on unless the pandemic and politics down there change their mind.   My husband is a great social animal and we have become new friends with the new neighbors on our right side, even though we are in the middle of a pandemic.  He is good at making friends by dropping off plants and they have responded by dropping off banana bread and chocolate covered strawberries!  

I have not met the new neighbors who own the large lot at the far end of the road near the highway, but he has built a dock for his 100K  or even more expensive boat.  The reason I am quoting prices here is that he must have lots of money and must be really disappointed he cannot get a home built on the river.  He does come by that dock and take his boat out on the weekends.  The boat is full of grandkids and a few adults.  Anyway, this last weekend I got to listen to some popular style of music (loud and repetitive) while he entertained on his dock.  His dock is almost a mile from my yard and yet I could hear the "noise."  Why do people always assume you like their style of music?  

Fortunately, it was for only several hours on a Saturday.  I am a bitch and would have called the police (even though they are overworked these days with protests and pandemics) and complained if it went on and on or if it happens more often.  I do not mind the occasional BBQ BUT!  Even my neighbor to the left of us in the big house was polite enough to call a few years ago to let us know she was holding her church service on her front lawn and we would have  "noise" for a few hours and hoped we would not mind.  She is a gem!  It was a one time only event and I did not mind.


To belabor this neighbor thing, I went down to my dock to take photos of our wonderful sunsets the other day and happened to look across the river to our neighbors on the other side of the river.  We only know them superficially because one of them is our Postmaster.  I took this photo.


They seem like such nice people...I will NEVER understand someone who likes 45 and claims he is a good leader.  If your grandfather likes to walk in on 15-year-old girls naked, makes fun of the "cripple" across the street, calls people names, and demands that you do not disagree with him EVER, he is not someone you like.  You may be required to be polite, but you are not going to vote for him for dogcatcher.

Ok, my last little note on neighbors.  As my readers may know, my son lives in a suburb near the city area of D.C.  You may (or may not) have read in the news about a 50-year-old white guy on a bike confronting three teenagers who were putting up protest flyers in support of the black lives matter movement in a park in that area.  Two were 17-year-old girls and one was a 16-year-old boy.  The biker assaulted the two girls tearing the flyers from their hands and then rammed his bicycle into the boy before riding away.  Since the boy was smart enough to film the assault on his cell phone, the man was identified and arrested.  ( I do not know if the teenagers were black or white, but that does not matter!)  The reason I am writing about this is I got a text message from my son today that this man lives a few doors down from my son's house and there was going to be a protest in the neighborhood as a result, so he wanted me to be aware and not be concerned! 

I had to add an addendum to this.  When my son stretched his and his new wife's money and bought his rather small house (smaller than 90% of the houses in his neighborhood) I was pleased because the area looked so stable and economically safe and middle class.  I do remember saying I was a little disappointed because it was certainly "white bread."  

You cannot pick your neighbors, but you hardly expect this!


24 comments:

  1. Sound travels so well over water and it does seem that some people do think sharing their particular music preferences is some kind of public service. I did see something on the news about Trumps support being down in the 30's and I was shocked. Really that high? How? And he lost some support for holding a Bible upside down. That's what it takes?
    Actually, I do accept that there are those who will not be swayed for any reason. My prayers are for the undecided or swayable middle to be persuaded that a change is due.

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  2. The pandemic, I believe, has caused a shallow depth of tolerance with a thinning layer of cranky just below the surface in everyone. Noise penetrates all layers, especially near water where sound can carry farther. Ear plugs can be a survival tool.
    As for the neighbor across the way, please forgive me for laughing when I saw that photo...and thought right away...Uhoh! There I go again, laughing.
    Prayers for us all

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  3. The neighbours in our first house warned us that they would be having a shivaree that would last into the wee hours. It was only once a year, so we were fine with it. It only happened twice, and then they moved on. (This shivaree did not include a march, but it was quite a niosy party.)

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  4. There is so much anger and rage these days. I do what I can to lower the temperature by being nice to my neighbors. As much as possible, that is. I do have one neighbor who sometimes annoys me but I try to keep a low profile with her. :-)

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  5. We are lucky with our neighbors both here and in Oregon. It's not as close as it once was but then we are not anywhere as much. That may change.

    As for voting. i don't understand how anyone voted for a serial liar, letting family profit from his power position, and even if you leave out the latest accusation, someone who has made women uncomfortable with his over familiarity for years (with lots of photos as the lies have been documented for years also). Where are we left when it comes to November?

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    1. I will vote for a potato over 45 as someone posted on FB.

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    2. Just be honest about what you are voting for, and everybody has to vote their conscience. What's a bummer, to me, is how each side turns on those who don't vote 'correctly' as being bad people. All of a sudden, it's not about Trump or Biden. It's about your neighbor or family member or doctor or anybody who isn't woke OR is. To be mad at the candidate is a distant thing. To be mad at friends and family for incorrect voting, that is what really hurts a culture. And it's where we are-- on both sides btw.

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  6. I wrote a nice response. Note that it isn't here. Frankly, I've become the clutz that always hits the wrong buttons. I did, and my answer vanished.

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    1. I am sure you did. I see you are getting better as your humor is more subtle.

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    2. When that happens, immediately try hitting "CTRL V" to paste from the clipboard. Sometimes what you've typed is left in the immediate memory. Worth a try...

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  7. We are friendly to our neighbors, but not really friends. We just acknowledge them. I don't know it I could tolerate a Trump flag though. Ugh. i got myself in trouble on Facebook yesterday with some of my Trump supporter people. I unfollowed them to avoid further pointless confrontation. I don't get it either. How could anyone support that man?

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  8. One of the reasons we like our neighbors is that we all agree to not talk politics.

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    1. Not talking politics might work for a while...wondering if that is what the Germans were thinking when Hitler rose to power.

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    2. Good call... I see these people praising Trump and I think to myself, "Are you really serious? Are you truly listening to what he's saying?"

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  9. Unless you have reason, beyond media rhetoric, to think we won't have an election in November we are not remotely close to Germany when Hitler got lifetime power. From the polls I've seen, Biden is ahead. Each of us gets one vote. We have to hope we use it wisely. Oh, and that whatever happens, it's the best.

    What I see happening a lot with social media is how the blaming each other tends to put us in bubbles where we don't hear any viewpoint but our own parroted back. Then if the election goes against what we wanted, we have to think it was crooked because we don't know the good people who actually are good and didn't vote as we would have hoped. I see why bubbles happen-- reassuring-- but not sure they are healthy for a culture that is as diverse as ours.

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    1. I do think 45 uses the Hitler's playbook and that he is supported by those who think like Nazis. That does not mean we have lost the country. But it does mean we elected a Facist or a Nazi! The much admired USA has put this idiot in power and those behind him are pulling the strings. It started when he said nothing when Erdrogan attacked Americans citizens on the Streets of Washington and he said nothing. It continues when he brings in military with no insignia to us chemical weapons on peaceful protestors I also have sat in restaurants where the conversations next to me were sickening. I will not start an argument with my neighbors, but I will not be afraid to respond.

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    2. You and I will have to agree to disagree-- if that is possible these days. Not sure it is when one side is evil and the other is good-- depending on what good or evil mean.

      I think for both sides-- read other opinions, even when uncomfortable...

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    3. I do try to see both sides. I do think it is important to have moderately conservative views to balance the liberal equation and you and I agree on more than we disagree on I am sure. But I just cannot get my mind around this man being something awfully evil and those following him are more dangerous than they realize.

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    4. We probably do agree on more than disagree. I have no opinion on Trump's soul. I go by issues to vote, which why last time It was Hillary as I don't have much use for her as a person. Now, I am stuck with Biden, who has a long history of using his power to profit his family; has lied about his accomplishments; threatened an auto worker with fighting him when the guy asked a question he didn't like, who has touched women in ways that made them uncomfortable (other stories are out there like the most recent but some got paid off by the shush fund; and seems on the verge of senility if not there. Just really dislike him and yet he might be president next year. I hope if that happens, he had a great veep pick, someone capable of taking over as it seems will happen sooner than later. I just don't know how a country as large as ours ends up with two, time after time, where voters often have to vote for the lesser of evils. Very disappointing, that good people, end up being winnowed out and we end up with the usual suspects...

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  10. Reminds me of the time when we had a new housekeeper show up and not 10 min. later there was a commotion outside and the DEA, Police and who knows what else came rushing the neighbor's house across the street. It was a drug bust -- the guy had been planning on making meth in his garage and had all sorts of chemicals and stuff in there. It took them days to clear out all the stuff. What a shocker -- we knew he used meth but had no clue it was this bad. :/

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  11. most the neighbors we socialize with are at the other end of our street and I've often wished we lived at that end except my doesn't have someone who plays loud music in his garage. and I've been pleasantly surprised to find that only one of our social group is a Trumper in this very Trumper town and when that came to light during our last social event we all changed the subject. hopefully she's adjusting her views. at my end though the crazy bitch who decided for whatever crazy reason that I was stealing her bricks and tomato cages after a year and a half of friendly encounters still owns the lot. fortunately she doesn't live there and I hardly ever see her.

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  12. This rather short lane upon which I dwell...in a very small, humble rented cabin (read "converted shed) has only four other homes on it. Each property consists of three or four acres in area. Across the laneway from my cabin the blook is about six to eight acres in area...and is covered in trees, shrubs and grass...no buildings. Having no neighbour at arm's length suits me just fine. I love it this way, even if my abode is a humble abode. :)

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  13. An addendum....the area in which you dwell certainly looks beautiful, Tabor. :)

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  14. Thank goodness all our neighbors in the near vicinity are not Trumpers. They are all very friendly though a couple of them (teenagers) forget that not everybody likes to listen to their partying or loud talking in the street at night. Seniors and babies like to be asleep by about 9:00. I actually did ask the grandparents and it’s much better... most of the time. What an AWFUL person that man is to attack those teens who were trying to make our country better.

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Take your time...take a deep breath...then hit me with your best shot.