Thursday, September 12, 2019

Blue is for Girls and Pink is for Boys

As in introvert I have found this rapidly ending summer to be a little "too much" in my face. I spent two weeks very closely interacting with relatives in July. I returned home to spending parts of weeks with my grandsons, involving planning days full of activities and love and joy.  This was followed by a weekend visit from my son and his wife, where I tried to give them a bit of respite from their demanding  lives. 

This coming weekend I am entertaining another young couple and their 2-year-old that I have not seen in 18 months, when the child was an infant.  I still am not sure why they are coming.  They want to expose the daughter to marine life...or  something like that!  While I am  flattered they think we are  good guides, I am also so done with company.  After all, in early October I am going to be on a 3 week  trip with my  family across China.  That should be a pleasure and so exhausting.  Those lonely short days of winter cannot come too  soon.

The coming visitors are "modern" parents focusing on gender neutral activities and ideas, even to the point of not allowing pink in the nursery.  It makes me realize that my ignorance of colors  and color stereotypes perhaps saved my sanity.  I had both a boy and a girl and therefore our house was full of all types of toys and books and I just let them play with whatever they wanted.  They also spent years in foreign countries which certainly broadened their view of the world and gender standards.  Seeing men in sarongs and skirts was common.  My daughter was a blue jeans kind of pre-teen and teenager and I did miss having the fun of dressing her up, but not the drama that comes with most girl teens!   Oddly today she wears designer clothes for her job.

My son participated in sports because we insisted for social  and health reasons, but music was his space for retreating and recharging.  Today his  hobby is songwriting.

While gender neutrality has its place, I think it is better to  focus on shelter and  rest in any color.


15 comments:

  1. Some things are over the top in my very unworthy estimation.
    In the meantime, as an introvert, I think I understand your mindset. All the best.

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  2. Shades of gray seem to be the color motif these days. It's a calming color as well ... so it might be worth a try!

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  3. You know what they say about guests: they are welcome for a day or two but then they begin to smell bad. I am looking forward to your China trip and hope you will post lots of pictures. :-)

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  4. I was always a gender neutral person-- and have never liked pink. I painted nurseries yellow. I encouraged the kids to play with whatever interested them. I offended my daughter one time where she wanted me to play Barbies with her, and I claimed mine was a truck driver. I didn't do it to offend her but to make the point that women can do whatever they have the abilities to do. She very much has lived that in her life; so maybe it was a good thing that day

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  5. Our grandson plays with his sisters’ gender specific toys as well as the cars and tractors of theirs which he gravitated to. His bed toy is a pink doll. I think if we relax about it, it works out.

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  6. Yes, it doesn't matter in the end as the kids sort it out in the end.

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  7. Better to focus on health of mind, body and spirit, at least to me.

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  8. I love having visitors but I also appreciate my solitude when they leave. My four children are healthy in body and spirit (as messymimi mentioned) and I hope in the mind, too. I encouraged them to be who they want to be and now they allow me to be who I want to be, although I occasionally catch a little eye roll if I am pushing the crazy old lady act too far.

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  9. Interesting to think about the impact of blue and pink.

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  10. Very well said. Todays helicopter parents are a worry.

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  11. October is almost here...for your trip...exciting! With our first child, we had no extra money so sometimes people thought our daughter was a boy from the clothes people handed down to us..lol Andrea

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  12. I LOVE hosting my family for gatherings, but also enjoy my alone time, probably too much.

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  13. Enjoy your holiday in China when it comes around.

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  14. As long as they become good people, that's all that matters. Some are not so lucky! Some kids do the opposite of what is demanded when they get grown because of a rebel streak, I think.

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  15. tHANK YOU FOR THINKING OF ME...IN COLOR TOO.
    Yes, I am grateful too be home again.

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Take your time...take a deep breath...then hit me with your best shot.