Sunday, April 21, 2013

Awkward!

Years ago, during the time that both my husband and I were working full time, we kept our community oriented  activities linked with our children's activities.  Whenever we participated in a bake sale or white elephant money raising activity it was usually tied to the soccer team or brownie scouts or some school event or for early years the church.  We operated within a small circle of parents and therefore knew almost everyone at the event.

Now we are no longer working full time and are able to devote more time to slowly becoming involved in this new (to us) small community through various volunteer activities and events.  We are slowly beginning to feel that we are no longer the newcomers.


Yesterday we spent seven hours on our feet promoting a children's community garden by getting children to plant a lettuce or broccoli plant in our demo garden as they attended a Green Earth Day exposition.  If this garden is not destroyed by a freak storm, eaten to the ground by Bambi, or some other unpredictable event, we hope to be able to harvest food throughout the season for a nearby food pantry.  Summer camp students will also be linked to the garden during their week at the art garden and learn and help.  As you can see above, the spring break school children have already decorated the stunning white oak that we obtained to make the boxes.





Many of the children were eager to plant their vegetable which we allowed them to mark with a 'name tag.'   They were encouraged to come by and visit their plant throughout the month.  Some of these families are military families and not able to garden as they would like, so we are hoping we gave them some ideas and allowed their children some fun.


Over 90 children helped us plant these vegetable beds.  At the end of the day, after we had planted the few plants that were left, loaded the remaining flats of lettuce into the car and checked to make sure all our hand tools were loaded, a well dressed handsome 60-year-old with a mustache stopped by the beds.   He greeted us by our name and praised our garden work.  Hubby greeted him back and the talk flowed back and forth for some time on gardening and the seasons and eventually descriptions of the pros and cons in each of our yards.

When he left I turned to Hubby and asked:  "Who was that?"

Hubby responded,  "I don't know!"

"Well, he knows us!"  I said, "I thought he might be that guy at the scientists club that had asked you to speak."

Hubby replied, "Yeah, so did I, but when he said he lived down by the point, I knew it wasn't that fellow because that guy lives near the cliffs."

I must admit that I am much more used to people NOT knowing who I am.  I hope that this is not going to happen habitually, yet something very similar happened at a talk we went to just a few nights ago.  The couple who sat behind us and recognized us had to introduce themselves in context (two months ago an evening dinner at a mutual friend's house) and then the light bulb went on over my head.  I hate being that type of person...old and doddery!  I have become the cliche which I cringed at seeing in others.

22 comments:

  1. Ah, don't be so hard on yourself! Everyone knows that it takes time to connect all the dots, especially in a new place. Happy adjustment!

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  2. proud of you
    much involvement in the past
    now
    just me, Miss Callie and the woods.
    then the thought came to mind
    maybe I should once again join the small local garden club.

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  3. It is so awkward, but it does happen. We forgive ourselves and we forgive each other. Still as we age,and there are not the contextual clues related to our professions or our children, it does sting to be on the receiving end. No one wants to be " mr. Cellophane "

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  4. Anonymous2:14 PM

    What a great initiative!

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  5. Good on you for becoming a part of the community!
    I've always been terrible at remembering other peoples names, and have tried to rectify that. Himself would drive me crazy by talking to someone for long periods of time and not introducing me, because he had no idea what their name was. Getting older is an adventure in living on the edge...

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  6. Ninety children helped? How wonderful. You're providing them with a great experience.

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  7. With all the people you've met over your lifetime, you're expecting yourself to remember a couple you met once several months ago in a group of people? You are being too hard on yourself, i think.

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  8. I almost never recognize people until they explain the connection. Once an old classmate of my brother's caught up with me at a professional conference--"I thought that was you. I recognized your laugh." Good grief. I have a recognizable laugh??

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  9. Great job ... and good inspiration for all your readers when they retire, too.

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  10. Anymore, I just come out with it and ask "How do we know each other?" Reestablishing a connection is better than going away wondering.

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  11. What a great project. Hey, we've all been there with the name thing! Thanks for coming by my blog this morning and for your great comment as well!

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  12. It is so hard to keep sorted all the names and faces...don't be so hard on yourself!
    Hugs
    SueAnn

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  13. Having been in your shoes, I try to tell people straight up who I am (I hope I am not insulting them) but I usually say it like, "Peruby, with such and such or somebody's sister, Mom" etc...

    Most are so relieved when I tell them.

    But, like you....the shoe has been on the other foot and I am trying hard to think "who is this?"

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  14. Maybe "old and doddery" on the outside but young and lithe on the inside. Mirrors are indeed our enemy. I am just now trying to break the upper crust of our community as we are newcomers of 7 years. We don't have community gardens or book clubs or anything like that and that upper crust is thickest in the churches. I'm starting with the senior center. Yikes!

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  15. Great post of an obviously great piece of work. Bless you both.

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  16. What a great projec!
    Beautiful photos of the garden and the beds ("canteiros" in Portuguese)

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  17. Nope, you both are just wonderful. I find if I don't see folks often, I don't remember their names. I've given up making excuses and just as for their names again.

    Yes, that garden is worth every big of effort you two have been putting out. Thanks.

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  18. What a super project. Who knows how many youngsters will grow up to love gardening and harvesting just through that one little plant? And who would have thought splodges would look so artistic on the oak?
    As for not recognising the man - it's happened to me all my life so I wouldn't worry about it being age intervening. It's just one of those things.

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  19. Actually, you’re not old and doddery. When we came this happened to us too. All it means is that you have to remember a lot of new people whereas they only have to remember you.

    I used to write down people’s names and a quirk of personality or snippet of conversation or even what they looked like. That way I sorted them out very quickly in my mind. One wonderful example was “yapp by name, yappy by nature". Honest.

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  20. Sounds like Floyd, the community garden and the people recognizing you, so many its hard to keep names straight or remember them.

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  21. That's a great project and so encouraging that so many turned out to take part. Good for all of you.

    I'm sure we've all been there with not recognizing a face who clearly knows us. Worse is noticing a familiarity and bot being able to place it, and realizing that you're missing verbal clues because you're too busy thinking about where you've seen them before. And of course by "you" I mean "me." ;)

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Take your time...take a deep breath...then hit me with your best shot.