Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Strange Food

I sometimes think I could live very well on another planet. There are many ways in which I do not understand my species. There are a number of reasons why my personality is much more stable when I am alone in the woods facing wild plants and animals. This following example is one reason I am confused these days:

Our office has a kitchen with a refrigerator, a sink and a microwave oven. Staff use the refrigerator to keep their breakfast and lunch food and the refrigerator is also used when we are planning a party for some reason or another. Fairly traditional stuff, right?

When I first came to work here I got a key to the kitchen. Yes, we keep it locked. When I asked why, I was told that food frequently disappeared, and so several years ago, they requested from the landlord that we get a lock.

Guess what? Food still disappears on a regular basis. There is no pattern. It doesn’t always happen overnight so we can’t blame the guards. It happens within the morning hours…sometimes. People will discover their lunch is gone. Sometimes just part of their lunch is missing! I have found my lunch missing a few times. Once before a staff birthday party all of the strawberries, whipped cream, and shortcake that were brought in that morning had disappeared by early afternoon.

I used to think it was that weird Hindu man that spent his work hours developing a religious web site instead of doing the job he was hired to do. Well, he was fired several years ago and the food continues to disappear!

The kitchen is used by at least 20 staff, so it would be hard to find out if it is any one of them. The kitchen is also around a corner and down the hall, so it is not easy to watch. One of my colleagues said that it was probably a kleptomania problem since all of us are paid well enough to afford food. I had never thought of this. It is creepy thinking that one of the people I work with has a psychological problem like this. Most of these people are professionals and there is a broad salary range. Bizarre.

I am tempted to buy this, but probably won’t. It would end up being a joke instead of a solution to the problem.

Counting the days, months and years until retirement.

(By the way did you see that Kimmie and Sasha? Wow. You go girls!)


  1. This would scare the heck out of me, too. I also thought to put a camera in the kitchen, but a real one. I didn't even know they made fake ones. Figures. I think I'll get one for fun.

    Maybe a cleptomaniac and an eating disorder combined. Yikes.

    I would also be tempted to put something nasty in the food, but not sure I could actually follow through. :) Evil Peruby, evil!

  2. Anonymous10:12 AM

    Wow...great and strange story. What I'm wondering is....after the person gets the food, what does he/she do with it? I mean, wouldn't he/she be seen gobbling it down or something? Keep us posted...I love a mystery.

  3. I realize I'm eating backwards here ... but I think if you ever find your socks, the food items will be with them!

    Workplace 'theft' is SO annoying because you're in a situation you can't escape from. You have to work with the same people every day and just sit and wonder.

    If it's any consolation at all - we had the exact same issues at three of my most recent jobs. I started bringing a mini cooler and keeping my lunch at my desk with me.



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